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  • How to be a Better Communicator in a Relationship

    Communication is a key component of any successful relationship, romantic or otherwise. However, it’s crucial to be able to communicate with your partner effectively. 

    When you don’t, your relationship suffers. You might start to lose trust and intimacy, or it could just feel like something is “off” between you. 

    Thankfully, a lack of communication doesn’t necessarily mean your relationship is “doomed”. There are several ways you can boost your communication efforts and improve the way you connect with your partner. 

    If you’re not sure where to get started, you’re not alone. 

    Learn how to improve communication in a relationship today:

    Accept and Understand Your Feelings

    If you know that you’re not communicating effectively with your partner, think about why. Something might be bothering you that you want to talk about. Or maybe you’ve been the one avoiding meaningful conversations. 

    Before approaching your partner, acknowledge those feelings. Even if they’re difficult, it’s important to accept and understand them. Doing so will make it easier to express them to your partner. 

    By keeping your feelings from your partner, you can’t blame them for not “understanding” or attempting to fix any problems. Work through your emotions first, and you’ll be more likely to express them calmly and clearly. 

    Be an Active Listener

    Communication is about more than speaking. 

    In fact, some might argue that listening is an even more important aspect of having a meaningful conversation. 

    If you want to be a better communicator with your partner, choose to be an active listener. That means more than just “hearing” what they have to say. Rather, it’s about showing them you’re paying attention through things like nonverbal cues, asking questions, and repeating statements for clarity. 

    When your partner knows you’re listening, they’ll be more likely to open up and show vulnerability. That will improve communication and intimacy. 

    Remember You’re On the Same Team

    When you’re talking to your partner about a difficult subject, it’s easy to want to place blame or focus on them, rather than yourself. 

    It’s important to remember you’re on the same team, especially when things are hard. When you take that approach, you’ll set healthier boundaries with each other. You’ll also be more willing to make compromising and resolution your ultimate goal. 

    There shouldn’t be a “winner” when it comes to a disagreement or even someone who takes control of a conversation. By viewing yourself as teammates, you’re more likely to talk without stepping on each other’s emotions. 

    Don’t Be Distracted

    We live in a busy society. It’s filled with distractions, from work and social activities to phones and televisions. 

    One of the easiest ways to improve communication with your partner instantly is to avoid those distractions while you’re talking. 

    Carve out time specifically to communicate with your partner every day. Shut off the television. Put your phone down. Don’t have that conversation while you’re washing the dishes or bathing your kids. Instead, focus all of your time and energy on your partner and your relationship. It will show them how important they are to you, and when they do the same in return, it will help to bolster your bond. 

    If you’re still struggling to communicate with your partner, don’t let frustration take over. There are so many factors that can play into effective communication. 

    The good news? You don’t have to deal with everything on your own. 

    Together, we’ll focus on more tools and skills you can use to communicate better with your partner and strengthen your relationship as a result. 

    Contact us for more information or to set up an appointment for couples therapy in Corte Madera, CA.